my waterloo

so it was started here..
i didn't realize that time flies very fast..
and he was my savior..
i really don't know how it started
but in a blink of an eye, im stucked to him..
i am deeply troubled on how i feel..
i just wanted to be beautiful, just like them..
experience being danced in a party, experience to be suited on, experience to be given such beautiful gifts on a special occasion..
yet, i am like this,,
a girl you shouldn't like to, the kind of girl you must hate.. because i am ugly more than you think..
ugly in a way that i didn't even know how it feels to courted on..
im feeling it's unfair because im always the one who falls for someone easily, while him can't..
i know it may sound very selfish and childish..
but that's the way i feel..
i can't be cured anymore.. it's helpless..



and i deeply disappointed him.. i never put some effort for my love for him.. i just say i love him, but i never showed it..
and i regretted the time that i fall.. when i know there's no one to catch me..
uhhh... it really hurts me..